4 Things I Had to Remember When They Didn’t Remember Me

My Memory:

It was a close game. It was hot and humid and I had not had a substitute for a while. My body ached with exhaustion, but adrenaline pushed me to keep running toward the Frisbee.

I’ve played a lot of Frisbee and a lot of people have commented on how surprisingly good my flick is for a girl. Every year, at a youth conference, my brother would put together a team for a very competitive Ultimate Frisbee tournament. This year, we were doing well. We had won two out of our three preliminary games and if we could win this one, we could get one of the best seeds in the tournament and possibly make it to the championship this year. We had gotten up to the semifinals last year.

The other team was ahead. I do not remember exactly what happened. I just know that this girl and I were closely guarding each other the whole game. Either they had the Frisbee and dropped it in the end-zone, or we had it and dropped it. Whatever happened, there was an instant shift in direction. I turned to run left as the other girl next to me turned to run right.

We hit heads.

I remember reeling back from the shock of the hit. I held my hand to my head for a moment until the pain lessened. When I turned, I watched the girl I’d collided with collapse to the ground.

From that point, there were medics everywhere. An ambulance was called. Everyone on the field stopped, knelt, and prayed for her for about half an hour.

I had a headache, but I figured that was normal for just hitting heads with someone. My aunt—a nurse—was asking me lots of questions to make sure I was okay. My sister was VERY attentive, and everyone on my team was very kind and considerate. I thought I was perfectly fine.

The other girl, however, I believe was taken to the ER and diagnosed with a minor concussion.

It wasn’t until 24 hours later, after no relief from terrible headaches, exhaustion, and uncontrollable emotional breakdowns, that it was discovered that I also had a minor concussion. Now, less serious than the other girl’s for sure. She even had to go home early.

For the rest of the week, I slept. Basically. Every waking moment was pained with a headache and severe exhaustion. The drive home was horrible. Especially since I was in a van with fourteen other people.

Everybody Else’s Memory:

I actually just saw a Facebook post from this youth conference about the girl who got a concussion when another girl (me) shouldered her in the head.

It became a big story from the week about how God worked in this other girl’s life through her concussion. It was posted all over social media, announced in the sessions. Everybody knew about this girl’s concussion and how she was hurt.

Except that it wasn’t my shoulder that hit her head. It was my head. And I got a concussion too.

But I didn’t get the media attention. Besides the people who interacted closely with me at that event, no one knew about my concussion.

It’s not a great feeling knowing that you were forgotten. Much less your PAIN was forgotten.

Some people want injuries because of the attention it gets them. One could say that I got all the down-sides of an injury without the up-sides.

When I read the Facebook post, it stung.

But, ultimately, I had to come to the conclusion that it really didn’t matter.

I had to remember several things:

1. It’s about your response

All sorts of terrible things will happen to me in life—this being on the low end of that scale. I am not responsible for what happens to me, but I am responsible to how I respond. This thing happened by accident and I was forgotten. If my response is to melt in self-pity, then I have sinned while they merely did not know all the information. 

2. Life doesn’t revolve around me

I am not the center of the universe. I think we’ve all heard our moms say tell us that. But they tell us because it’s true. I felt offended because the other girl got more attention than I from the same injury.

Getting our minds off of ourselves is a skill that we will never completely master, but something we should seek to accomplish because our Lord is selfless (Phil 2:3-4).

3. That other girl suffered more than me

Instead of moping because I didn’t get the attention, I should have looked to the other girl and been thankful that I wasn’t sent home. I should have been thankful that my concussion was less serious. After all, I was pretty miserable for about three weeks after it. She would have been miserable for longer than I.

4. In the end, it didn’t matter

Now, nearly a year later, does it really matter who got the attention? No. It doesn’t. So what do I accomplish by pitying myself?

Maybe some of you can relate to the self-pity that can take over your heart. Maybe you’ve had a similar experience.

But when I had this experience and had my sinful reaction, I had to repent and come away thinking, “It just doesn’t matter.”

If you think everyone has forgotten you, then look at the cross. If anyone should forget you, it’s the King of the Universe who’s watched innumerable people walk this earth. Yet He has never forgotten you or lost track of you. And this is why it doesn’t matter if someone else forgets you.

Have you ever felt overlooked or forgotten? How did you fight self-pity? Any thoughts or stories? Share in the comments!