How to Surrender Your Bitterness | 30 Days of Surrender Available for Pre-Order!

If you didn’t catch last week’s announcement about the 30 Days of Surrender ebook, go check out now! Today we have a special treat; Isabella Morganthal, one of the writers for 30 Days of Surrender, has agreed to interview with us today. She wrote two devotionals in the ebook, Surrender Life and Surrender Bitterness.

This interview is about how to overcome your struggles with bitterness. And guess what? We are going to give you the first chapter of 30 Days of Surrender—for free!! *throws confetti into the air* And the reason is because we are celebrating that 30 DAYS OF SURRENDER IS AVAILABLE FOR PREORDER!!!

Go order your copy and while you wait for August 21, here is Isabella’s devotional Surrender Bitterness.

 

Surrender Bitterness

“Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”

Ephesians 4:31-32

I couldn’t let it go.

I said I did. I even said I forgave him. I tried every day to convince myself that I did not hate my biological father.

But the truth?

I hadn’t forgiven him at all. 

I grew up in a single parent home. My biological father was only in my life for a short time, but it was long enough to leave memories and scars that hurt. Deep inside of my heart I was so bitter towards him for the things he had done. I wanted him to hurt the way I had hurt. Holding onto my bitterness felt like a way to punish him. 

Everyone struggles with bitterness at some point.  

Maybe a parent wounded you too. Maybe you lost a dream you prayed so hard for. Maybe a best friend betrayed you. Maybe a teacher’s criticism broke your spirit. Whatever your particular circumstances may be, I do know that every single one of us has been hurt by someone in our lives. It is almost inevitable.

Many people are tempted to hold onto their bitterness. Yet that bitterness we tend to hold so tightly does not punish the other person. Trust me, I know it feels like it will. But that bitterness only punishes you.

Holding onto bitterness is like locking yourself inside of a prison for something someone else did. Bitterness keeps you trapped inside the memories and pain of what happened to you, and it chains you in the past. 

Jesus did not die for you to be chained to your past. He died to set you free. To set you free from your sin and to set you free from your hurt. If you run to Jesus, He will heal your pain. 

I know from experience it is not easy, and it is much easier to fall back into patterns of bitterness. It is a daily struggle. But the first step to your freedom is letting go.

Start the process of letting go of the pain, letting go of what happened, and choosing to forgive the person who wronged you. Because forgiveness is a choice. A choice that you must keep making.

Jesus loved us so greatly that He chose to forgive us, even when we turned our backs on Him and spit in His face. 

Today He is asking you to extend that same forgiveness to the person who hurt you. Read the last verse from above again. Forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. When we look at how greatly He has forgiven us, how can we do any less for others?

I challenge you to take one step today towards surrendering your bitterness. Whatever that step is to you. Maybe it is admitting out loud that you forgive someone. Maybe it is writing down your pain so you can get it all out and move on. Maybe it is first accepting the forgiveness Jesus is offering to you, so you can go and extend that to someone else. 

Surrender it to Him. And let Him set you free. 

How to Surrender Bitterness: Interview with Isabella Morganthal

Thanks for joining us on the blog today! What did you learn while writing for 30 Days of Surrender?

Isabella: Wow, what a great question! While writing for 30 Days of Surrender, I learned a lot about trusting God with what I was writing and also just the importance of living out what I write. When I wrote about my second topic, surrendering life, I was challenged to make every moment of my life count for Jesus—to watch how I use my seconds, minutes, and hours for Him. While writing about my topic, surrendering bitterness, I was challenged to examine my heart and see areas of this I might not have fully surrendered to the Lord yet.

You wrote about surrendering bitterness. What made you pick that topic?

Isabella: Well, when I first saw the list of topics available to write about for the devotional, I thought of choosing something different. Bitterness was honestly not my first choice because, to be truthful, it’s something I still struggle with. And, as I said in the article, letting go of bitterness is a daily struggle. After praying about the list, I strongly felt God telling me to choose bitterness and write about my experience of surrendering that to Him. I felt so inadequate, because I fail at this so many times. I prayed and told God that I would write about this topic and what He’s been teaching me, and I needed His strength to live it out daily!

In Surrender Bitterness, you talked about growing up in a single parent home and your bitterness toward your father. What was your journey in coming to peace and forgiveness about this?

Isabella: It was a long, difficult journey, and sometimes the past still comes up and it can be a struggle. Yet in the midst of it, there were three things that helped me the most.

First, God had forgiven me of a great debt. I was a sinner who had sinned and failed against God over and over. If I accepted His forgiveness and grace towards me, how could I not give that away? It reminds me of the Parable of the Unforgiving Servant that Jesus told in Matthew 18:21-35.

Second, I realized that by holding onto bitterness I was only hurting myself. We’re not hurting the other person by keeping feelings of bitterness and hatred trapped inside. We might think this is our way of “getting back,” but it’s not. It’s hurting ourselves. So those were thoughts that helped me on my journey with coming to forgiveness.

Finally, just realizing that I am a priceless daughter of the King. My true Father adores me and is a good, good Father who has a good plan for my life. To fully step into the reality of my identity as His daughter, I had to let go of the past and my bitterness about my earthly father. Am I saying I never fail at this now? Of course not! There are still days that are super hard and it’s a daily battle, but one that I hope to keep overcoming by the grace of God.

What advice do you have for people trapped in bitterness?

Isabella: Wow, I would say, “I know it hurts. I know it is super hard. But it’s worth it in the end.” You’ll be able to live in so much freedom and joy when you let go of what you’re holding inside. When you give it to Jesus, you’re giving Him the opportunity to work and bring justice, peace, and freedom to your situation. Holding onto the bitterness keeps you holding onto the pain, and that keeps you stuck in the past so you can’t move forward. God has a beautiful destiny and plan ahead for you and He wants you to step into it. Even if you take one step forward, only to take two steps backwards again, keep going and taking those baby steps forward. It’s worth it.

What daily habits would you recommend for avoiding a lifestyle of bitterness?

Isabella: Well, there are several habits I would recommend.

First, be thankful. Keep a thankfulness journal. It might seem odd at first, but by writing down every day the things that you are thankful for, it frees your heart to embrace all the good gifts God has given you, instead of always focusing on the pain others have caused you.

Also, pray hard every day. Fight the battle of forgiveness on your knees. It’s only something that you can do with the strength of God. Fight the battle with Him.

And finally, I would recommend speaking it out loud, every day if you have to. Speak out loud, “I forgive _____ (fill in the blank).” I did this, but I wrote it down in my journal. I would write, “I forgive him,” and it really helped to change my heart. Even if you don’t feel much forgiveness in your heart, speaking it daily will slowly change things.

If you could break down overcoming bitterness into three steps, what would they be?

Isabella: Great question!

Number one, feel your pain. It’s so easy to bury the pain or cover it up by being angry and bitter. Don’t do this! It only hardens your heart and keeps you from letting anything else in. So cry, scream if you have to, but recognize that you have been hurt.

Number two, pray about it. Give it to Jesus. You can’t do this journey on your own, trust me, I know. Give the pain, the disappointment, and the loss to your Savior who loves you more than you could’ve ever imagined. Pray and talk to Him about it.

Number three, give back what was given to you. Grace and forgiveness was given to you and to me when we deserved it the least. Considering how much God has forgiven us, we can’t keep it all to ourselves. We need to extend it.

I’ll throw this out there, that if you were in an abusive or harmful (emotional or physical) relationship, this does not mean allowing that person back into your life. Forgiveness can be extended to someone without allowing them the opportunity to harm you again. Choose to extend the grace and forgiveness God has given you, to others who have wronged you.

Isabella Morganthal is a twenty-year-old author, blogger, musician, and creative arts director. She’s been writing for over ten years and has self-published four books which can be found at her website: http://www.isabellamorganthal.weebly.com/. You can also connect with her over at her blog: http://www.Jesusisworthitall.weebly.com/. Aside from writing, she loves the summer sun, beach air, kisses from kittens, and old bookstores.

I hope that you enjoyed the free chapter and interview with Isabella! Go check her books and blog out! And don't forget, you can now make your purchase!!! 30 DAYS OF SURRENDER IS AVAILABLE FOR PREORDER!!

Have you struggled with bitterness and unforgiveness? What have you found to overcome that? Share in the comments! 

P.S. If you gave this post a few social shares to spread the word about this ebook, you would be my favorite person ever!!! :)