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10 Tips for Beating a Crush: Tip 1

Anastasis Faith
I remember being obsessed with this boy years and years ago. I would see him at church, float for a few hours, and then crash at home. 
I would sob and sob as soon as I closed the door to my room. Back then, I journaled every day. I poured out my desperation--I was so obsessed, I liked him so bad! But I was only twelve and there was nothing I could do about it.
Must I wait ten years with these overwhelming feelings? I wrote in my journal.
God took my shambled emotions and slowly built up something much stronger.
I want to live a life in pursuit of Christ. Sometimes crushes can be distracting. Sometimes they are harmful. Other times they are good, but simply need to be managed.
By no means is anything perfect, but I have learned so much. I hope that if you are struggling in this area this series will be a blessing, challenge, and encouragement to you.
If you missed the post, “Ten Tips for Beating a Crush—The Heart,” I high encourage you to read that before reading this post. Having all the practical tips in the world won’t help unless you have a heart that desires to put Christ above all else.
Now on to today’s tip for beating a crush!
Manage an overwhelming crush

1.   Change your mindset

Change your mindset from “I’m out of control!” to “I’m not bound to my feelings.” I don’t have to be driven by my emotions.  

“Everyone who competes in the games exercises self-control in all things. They then do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. Therefore I run in such a way, as not without aim; I box in such a way, as not beating the air; but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified.” 1 Corinthians 9:25-27 (emphasis added)

Don’t build your life upon your emotions. Discipline your emotions—take control of them! And ultimately, let Christ drive your emotions, rather than letting your emotions drive your attitude toward God.
Yes, emotions are hard to control, but through God’s grace, we can overcome our feelings and surrender them back to God.
Change your mindset from “I need a guy” to “I need God.” 
 Because YOU DON’T NEED A GUY. God created you to need Him, not a guy. In the case of most of us, God probably did create us to be the helpmeet for a certain guy. But right now, when we’re not married, we don’t need a guy. Even when we’re married, God is our true need and fulfillment. Putting aside the mindset of “I need a guy” has helped me realize more and more that I need God. 

“And my God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:19 

“So we can confidently say, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?’”  Hebrews 13:6

Change your mindset from “potential husband” to “brother in Christ.”
A good way to do this is to not allow yourself to think of him in a way that you wouldn’t think of your brother (assuming you have a brother). This helped me a lot. Also, pray for him. And not prayers like, “God, please help him like me.” 
Remember that guys struggle a lot and they’re fighting sin in their lives just like we are. Especially in this culture and world, our brothers in Christ need our prayers, not our flirtations (read why I don't flirt here). Pray for them that God would give them strength and build them into the leaders they are called to be. 

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.” James 5:16

“How can a young man keep his way pure?
By keeping it according to Your Word.” Psalm 119:9

We need to change our mindset from what Satan and the world wants us to believe to the truth found in God’s Word.  Changing your mindset about yourself and the guys around you is a huge step in beating a crush.

What are your thoughts? Have you found yourself overwhelmed by your emotions? What lies have you believed about guys? What has God been teaching you about staying focused on Him through a crush? Share your comments!

10 Tips for Beating a Crush: The Heart

Anastasis Faith
Beating a crush is one of the hardest and most complicated things to do as a teen girl. Even though many of us would admit that we’d prefer to be totally sold out for God and not interested in guys, we can’t deny the facts. Crushes are fun, especially if they’re mutual. They make you feel good. 

Overcome a Crush
But there’s another side to them. They have the potential to completely ruin your life. Crushes seem huge, daunting, overwhelming—not conquerable. They can often make us feel helpless. Like we have no control.
They distract us from day-to-day life. If you email/text/snapchat/etc him, then more than often, you’re constantly checking your phone or laptop to see if he wrote back. When he’s in the room, you can’t focus on your friends. You have to find a way to be in his conversation. When he isn’t around, you’re either grumpy or you’re talking about him—or both. You’re asking your friends, “Do you think he likes me? Do you think he’s ‘The One’ for me?”  
You’re imagining how he will propose to you. Your wedding. Your future
Crushes are hard to deal with. Especially when they’re big. They’re draining. And you don’t get anything back. They only leave you emptier.
Beating a crush is hard because, often, you don’t want to beat it. 
It’s easier, simpler, and more fun just to let your heart run loose.
And you can’t beat a crush unless you want to. I’ve found that in situations like that in my own life, I have to take it to God and say, “Lord, I want to have a crush. But I want to want to not have a crush. I want to want to pursue You with my whole heart. Please give me the desire to run after You. Please give me the strength to fight.”
I’m not saying that crushes are sinful, but I am saying that I believe they can easily lead to sin. Probably the number one sin you can commit with a crush is putting him above God.  That is the sin of idolatry.
Who do you think about more? God, or a guy? If you say guy, then you’ve put him as a higher priority than God.
So, we’ve established that crushes are very cumbersome and in some cases, sinful. How do we beat the #1 problem in a teen girl’s life? How do we apply Hebrews 12:1-2? 

“Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”
Hebrews 12:1-2

Over the next few weeks, I’m going to post some tips that I and others have found helpful for beating a crush. They’re not 100% guaranteed to work or your money back. Please understand that I do not write this as one who has arrived and has all the answers. I write this as someone who is searching and who is there in the trenches with you, fighting. I don’t have all the answers, but I have been there. And I have learned so, so much.
If you have a crush that you know you shouldn’t have, such as a crush on an unbeliever, a very weak Christian, an immature guy, etc, then you should view this series as tips to help you eradicate the crush.

If you have a crush on a godly guy who you could actually see yourself spending your life with, then you should view this series as tips to help you manage your crush. In this case, beating a crush isn’t so much about beating physical attraction than it is about beating the distraction of a crush. We want to “lay aside every encumbrance,” and get rid of distractions. God should always have first place in our lives. Especially when we’re too young for commitment, we need to learn to keep our crushes under control.
Also know that the next series of posts isn’t going to help you unless you have a desire to eradicate/manage your crush. 
I encourage you to  spend some time in prayer and ask Jesus to change your heart. Ask Him to cause you to desire Him more than anything else in this world. Ask Him to open your eyes to see that He truly is all you need and that He alone can satisfy you. Without Jesus to fill your heart, you will simply run back to a guy. We’re too weak to fight. Only by God’s strength through God’s grace can we beat a crush. 
Come back next week for the first tip on how to beat a crush!

Are you struggling to beat a crush? Do you feel like it’s overwhelming? What has God taught you, either through feeling bound by a crush or by defeating one? Share in the comments!

How to Win at New Years Resolutions

Anastasis Faith
What a year 2017 has been for Morning Glory! The biggest milestone was definitely publishing 30 Days of Surrender. I encourage you to sit down and think about all that has happened and remember God's faithfulness through it all. For many of us, 2017 has been a great year; for many of us, 2017 has been a devastating year. Whatever it held for you, I can say for certain that God is good and God is faithful.

As we look toward 2018, many of us are making New Year's Resolutions. I usually make them, but I would write them in my journal only to forget about them. 

How have New Year’s Resolutions gone for you in the past? I went through one of my old journals to find these resolutions from when I was fourteen.

1. Finish the Bible

2. Learn to forgive more freely

3. Become best friends with my sister

4. Grow in my relationship with Mom, Dad, and God

5. Keep my room clean for two months

      These are both awesome and terrible resolutions. Why? The heart behind them was good. But at the same time, I made goals for myself that were in many ways immeasurable. I don’t know which ones I considered conquered at the end of the year because I didn’t look back at this list one time since when I made it.
      Let's look at some tips on how to make good resolutions AND go through with them. How about we rework these goals?

1. Finish the Bible

I will do this by buying a Daily Bible and reading it in one year. Every morning, first thing, I will read my Bible. If I miss the morning, I will read at night before bed or at my lunch break.

2. Learn to forgive more freely

Find three verses on forgiveness and memorize them. Remember these truths about forgiveness: 1) You cannot meditate on what you’ve forgiven, and 2) You cannot share with others the things you have forgiven. This will be measured by a lack of bitterness in my heart against people.

3. Set aside an hour once a week to focus completely on my sister

I’ll put my phone and laptop away. If we have to schedule a regular time, then we’ll do that.

4. Make sure to read my Bible every day and have a conversation with both Mom and Dad that doesn’t involve me asking for something. 

5. Every night before I go to bed, I will clean my room.

      You see how much more achievable and measurable these goals are? Now, these goals are not perfect, but they’re far better than the first set.
      Consider the goal, “Lose weight.” That’s one of the most common New Year Resolutions every year in America. What’s a better way to phrase that goal? How about, “Lose five pounds by May.”
      What’s the key here? Your goals need to focus on two things:

Being achievable

Being measurable

      And then write them down in a place where you will see them often. Don’t forget about them—that defeats the purpose of making them. Ask for accountability too!

What is a better way to phrase the goal, “Live a healthier lifestyle”? What about, “Save more, spend less”?
What are some of your New Year’s resolutions? Want accountability? Share them in the comments!

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