6 Red Flags You're Obsessed with Your Crush

Anastasis Faith
When I was younger, I did not understand the balance of having a crush and living life in pursuit of Christ. My first crush was a complete disaster to my life because it took over my emotions, my mind, my energy, and my time. When I saw him, I floated. When I was at home, I was a wreck.
I was obsessed.
I remember finally getting to a point where I was like, “I cannot live like this. I need to beat this crush. It cannot rule my life.”
The feelings of affection for someone honorable and God-fearing who you could actually see yourself spending your life with are one thing. The obsession and idolization of a guy is another completely different ball game.
How do you know when you’re obsessed with your crush?
1.     You daydream
Don’t deny that when you like someone, you daydream. Which is normal and natural. But you need to be careful of conjuring up sinful fantasies, or making up your perfect guy. Or taking the guy you like and making him into something he isn’t! Daydreaming can QUICKLY get out of hand, and if you find yourself constantly daydreaming, that’s a big red flag that you’re obsessed with your crush.
2.     You aren’t as interested in reading your Bible. You talk to an imaginary guy instead of God, etc.
This is really bad. If a guy takes the place of God in your life, then he’s becoming an idol, and that is sinful. A guy cannot replace God. Because he’s human! The only way we can truly love and enjoy a guy is to first love and enjoy Christ. If our needs are not met in Jesus, then we will become a needy parasite that he will want to get away from.
3.     You don’t work as hard
Your work ethic goes ZAP! Instead of doing school or working, you are sitting there chewing on your pencil imagining him rescuing you from a terrifying situation. If you cannot get anything done in a day because you’re thinking about your crush, then that is a sign that you are obsessed with him.
4.     Your joy is dependent on whether or not he shows up, responds to your text message…etc.
You’re kind of dumpy at home. Instead of finding a deeply rooted sense of joy in the person and reality of Christ, your happiness is as shallow as whether or not he smiles at you.
5.     You view your girl friends as competition
Your best friends become rivals. Your crush cannot talk and joke with another girl without you getting envious of them, and angry at him at “not being faithful,” even if you have no right to him.
6.     You look to him to meet your needs
You need his smile to be happy. You need his attention to feel worth and value. You need him to like you in order to have an identity.

If you do any of these things, it might be a sign that your crush has become too high of a priority in your life. All of these are extremely dangerous. We cannot find our joy, identity, and worth in another human being. Those are needs that only Christ can need. If you want to love your future husband, you need to first have your needs met in Christ so that you can pour into him. A guy will always fail you, even if he’s the most incredibly godly person on the planet. And you will be a drain on him if you expect him to meet your needs.

Have you ever been obsessed with your crush? What are other signs that you are obsessed with your crush? What tips do you have for solving this problem? Share in the comments!

Anastasis Faith / Author & Editor

Anastasis is a Texas girl who enjoys writing, blogging, and music. You can connect with her here on her blog, or at morningglorypursuingjesus@yahoo.com


  1. I read this post awhile ago, but reading it again, I feel like it truly applies to me. I feel those exact same things. After reading this again, however, I realize that I don't need a guy in my life to be happy...in fact I don't need a guy at all! Thank you for sharing this, Anna. It is such a great encouragement and reminder:)

    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment and let me know! I am so glad to hear that!

      Being in a place of obsession with a guy is a hard place to be in (I've been there way too many times). But God never LEAVES you there, which is always my hope. Guys are a blessing and having a boyfriend/husband is a wonderful gift from God, but that's not life's GOAL and it's not where meaning is found.

      Thanks for commenting! Keep pursuing Him. :)

  2. For about a year now, I’ve liked this guy and after half of that time...I realized my life revolved around him. When he talked to me, I wondered if he cared for me and if we may end up as a couple. I even thought about getting close to his friends and influencing them to bring us together. After I actually thought about how I was acting, I realized how disturbing my life was. Many times, I asked how I could do those things and so on. About two months ago, I finally asked God to protect me and influence me in ways that my obsession becomes a Godly love caring for his future and my own. A love without selfish ambition and ungodly attraction. I have made strides toward this and I can confidently say that there has been progress and he has made into a better person. The crush I had turned into a person I respected for his Christ-like lifestyle and love for others and God. In the future, I long to grow as a better Christian and hope he does too.


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