Should I Write Letters to My Future Husband?

Anastasis Faith
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Writing letters to your future husband is a way I’ve heard that many girls deal with their desire to have a guy right then.
I’ve done it. I haven’t written many, but I’ve written a few.
Potentially, this could be a wonderful wedding gift for your future husband.
Potentially, however, this could not go down as you expected.
It all depends on the guy you marry.
Of course us, as ladies, would LOOOOOVE to get a stack of letters from our future husbands that they had written before they knew us. Yes, we would all be like, “AWWWWWWW!”
But you cannot forget that guys are different then we are. To be quite honest, he might look at that stack and say, “Good grief, I’m not reading all that.”
Or you might get a husband who starts reading them, but forgets part way through and leaves them in a closet. 
Then again, you may get a guy who picks up and reads every single letter.
My point is that there are many different types of men out there.
You don’t know which one you’re going to get.
If you want to write letters to your future husband, then go for it. But do not attach your heart to those letters. Do not expect him to treasure them. If he does, then what wonderful gift! But if he doesn’t, be ready.
Do not destroy the joy of being a newlywed because you’re upset that he never read your letters.
Just because he didn’t read your letters doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. He just expresses and receives that love very differently.

P.S. A guy will typically find less appeal in a letter that’s more like a journal of yours than a letter. So keep that in mind as you write.

Do you write letters to your future husband? If so, when did you start? Why did you start? If you don’t write letters, is there something else that you do? Or do you think all of that is stupid? Share in the comments! :)

Anastasis Faith / Author & Editor

Anastasis is a Texas girl who enjoys writing, blogging, and music. You can connect with her here on her blog, or at


  1. Yeah, I've thought about that before. I wrote, like, two of them before I thought, this is kind of embarrassing. I'm pouring my heart out into a piece of paper, and saying things that are too mushy for what I would say in person. Then I thought, if I'm cringing, then surely the guy I gave them to would cringe too. Just looking at the boys in my class who don't even do required reading, I can't really imagine a guy actually wanting to take the time to read letters I wrote as a teenager.

    I mean, it's cute, but I can't really think of one guy who would actually read them :) :)

    Thanks for the post!
    ♥♥♥ Laura

    1. Lol! And it's fine to do that! You may end up marrying some guy who treasures those couple of letters, if you gave them to him. But then, like you said, you may end up marrying someone who would react quite differently.

      It's all just subjective, and I'm glad that you don't have the expectation that he will adore them. If he does, though, it would be super cute!! ;)

      Thanks for commenting!

  2. Wow, what a different way to look at it...I never thought about it that way! 😊 I've written maybe two or three letters but really it's not my thing, so I don't think I'll write too many more. But thanks for that point!!

    1. Some people enjoy it more than others, of course. Unless I'm writing prayers, I find it hard to know WHAT to write about! I'm not sure if you have the same struggle or not. ;)

      Thanks for commenting!

  3. I write a few letters to and prayers for my future husband in a small journal. Just short little snippets, meant to just be picked up and read as it happens. Something I've thought about, if something should ever happen to me, is that he would have something tangible from me from a time in which he may not necessarily have known me.

    1. That's great, Dani! That's another good perspective to have on this issue.

      Thanks for commenting!

  4. Great post, Anna. I'll quickly share an experience of ours. When my daughter-in-law was young she journaled about all kinds of things, including her future husband. When she married my son she said, "Do you want to read all my journals??!!!" And he, being that son, said, "Uh.... not really. I mean, I love you but... not really." So he's definitely that type.
    I love how you pointed this out. Your future husband may be wowed by this and can't wait to read every word, maybe even twice. And he may not. Journaling or letter writing with this is mind will not end in disappointment or frustration.


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