I opened up my
first journal that I received when I was nine years old. Here’s a super
embarrassing excerpt from when I was eleven. For ease of reading, I left out
the spelling errors.
I have just realized how mature I am. Give
or take, I still like to play pranks on my sister Liza. And I still like
fairies. But I know so much. Mom trusts me and tells me she doesn’t have to
worry about me spilling beans about stuff. I’m really interested in politics. I
listen to conversations about Dad’s company. I feel like I’m not a little child
anymore. Some people, like my babysitter, think that I’m a little child—not
knowing right from wrong. She punished me because I tried to tell her that my
brothers aren’t allowed in my room! She said that I talked back, which I did.
But that was because she wouldn’t listen! I wish people would stop treating me
like a little ignorant child!
The next entry was
me venting because one of my siblings had “mistreated” me. A few entries later
I was yet again complaining about someone else. I ended that entry by praying,
“Dear God, please change this person’s heart.”
I seriously should
probably burn some of these journals. Or at least go through with a thick
sharpie! Over the years, I’ve learned more about journaling and more about
honoring God in my journal.
Just because it’s
private does not mean that it’s an excuse to sin.
So how do we dishonor God in our journals? Here
are five ways that you can sin while journaling.
1. Complaining
This is probably
one of the biggest sins in my journal. I
complained about people, I complained about school, I complained about
EVERYTHING. It’s easy, when we’re mad, to just rush to our journal and pour out
our frustration. While sometimes this can be helpful in getting rid of a spirit of bitterness and anger, it may
more often be a way to savor the anger longer.
2. Using it to keep a record of wrongs
I would harbor
bitterness in my heart against my siblings, my parents, and other people in my
life who made me angry. My journal became a storehouse of offenses instead of a
fountain of joy from a prayerful walk with Christ. Writing things down is a
GREAT way to keep records of wrongs, which the Bible says is not love (1 Corinthians 13:4-8). And 1 John 4:20 says that we cannot hate our brother and
love God.
I don’t know if
you have ever done this, but I think the clip above from my journal is enough
to tell you that yes, I journaled about how great I was. Which is super
embarrassing and now quite humbling. I was a very arrogant kid. Pride is the
root of all sin and it is something we will always be fighting. I had more than
my fair dose of arrogance, however.
Maybe it goes
without saying, but it didn’t for me. Talking about how great you are doesn’t
honor God. Even if no one else reads it, it is self-glorification when we
should be only glorifying our Savior.
4. Being boy-crazy
My journal was
more like a soap opera drama than anything else. You can totally process your
feelings and think through potential boys. But if that’s all that you’re journaling about, you’re teaching yourself to be
boy-crazy. It’s a hard line to walk, but God is not honored when we make our
journals places that we idolize the cutest guy in our circle of friends.
5. Dwelling on sinful thoughts
Journaling can be
a great way to process life and sort through emotions. I love journaling now,
because it often leads into prayer and such peace. But when I was younger, I
often used it as a means to dwell on sinful and arrogant thoughts instead of
surrendering those to the obedience of Christ (2 Corinthians 10:31). These can
include bitterness, anger, lust, envy, or idolatrous thoughts.
A journal is a
personal place to process life and commune with our heavenly Father. Just as
the private place of your mind is under scrutiny by God, so is the private
place of your journal. A journal is a wonderful thing. For those of us who need
writing to survive like I do, journaling has been a serious blessing from
heaven. It’s the most effective way in my life to surrender my worries to God.
I regret the years
that I dishonored God in my journaling and I encourage you to learn to avoid
these pitfalls.
For more thoughts
on journaling, check out this Girl Defined article, Don’t Let Your Journal Turn Into a Soap
Opera Drama.
Do you journal? What have
been the number one BEST and WORST things about journaling? Share in the
comments!
The best thing in my journaling has been the ability to go back and see the ways God was working to bless me through my struggles. The worst thing, probably that I have so much to say I wear out my hand!
ReplyDeleteThat's wonderful! I'm glad that's been the worst thing for you! :D I really enjoy journaling and I'm glad I've learned some things since being nine. :P
DeleteThanks for reading and commenting, Abigale!
This was very thought-provoking, Anastasis Faith. Thanks for sharing these five pitfalls we can fall into with our journaling!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for reading, Kenzi! I'm so glad to hear that it was thought-provoking! Thanks so much for letting me know.
DeleteAppreciate your comment! :)
I hadn't really thought about this before.... Thanks for posting!
ReplyDeleteSavannah, it's something I had not thought about in my journaling experience until somewhat recently. I knew that I had dishonored God in my journal, but after digging deeper it became clear HOW you can dishonor God.
DeleteThanks so much for reading and commenting!